Continued...

What on earth is tis blog up to? Either the entry missing or it posted without me clicking on it and eventually onli the title is stored.

I'm so stressed up... With work! The previous receptionist had left and i'm left alone to cope with everything. I hate tis work place cos i'm alone at level 1 and i'm like a door-watching dog... Got to see which master went out and which master came back. If not, sumone whom she tink she's BIG will starts to grumble again.

But still, there's still mani whom i love... they are my dear big sistas... so caring towards me... so touchy... opps... aniwayz, look at the time now! its 10.20am... Well, i'm of cos at work right now... Juz now i was tokin to 1 of my colleague cos she goin out... she drives... so fortunate... summore she can no nid to work oreadi... her husband is rich... each of them drives their own car... wow...
Stop dreaming! i'm golin crazy soon... i'm supposed to be back here with regards to the previous entry. Friday i was sooooo angry... b'cos of tt Jo... but now, i've learnt sumthing... if people wanna provoke u, dun fall into their trap. So u should show them happy face instead! Haha... Nice one...

Met up with Kelvin last friday... tt fat cat... Kelf Kelf Kelf... Grown fat oreadi wor~ Last time ask me slim down... now he gain weight himself. Oh my... Fatty fat cat now... Betta stop eating so much before u turn into a GIGANTIC cat... Really unable to recogise him when i saw him... Aniwayz, we went to Holland V. Crystal Jade to eat... nice place there...

But with Kelf, its impossible to finish up the food cos thru' laughing, u'll feel full... I onli ate a bit and i was laughing all the time. Cant tahan... lidat sure slim down. Eat aso wan to suan me. Walk also wan to bully me... haiz... but he still is a gentleman la... at least he acts like one... haha... though mani say he's a gay cos no gf till now... but he got EXS... who interested in him, can tell me... actually he's not tt fatty fat kind of guys... juz tt compare to the past, he's swollen a little. haha.... baddie me...

Dun wanna type animore. Cos i wana work...before anione finds out i'm slackin...

Brief summarize...

I'm so fed up! i've entered the entry but nothing came out! So here i am retyping 1 thing which is something which i am unhappy about and i dun wanna change the title!

I went to work for tis week.... today is the worst day cos there's sumthing happen which is not my fault and someone blames me for it... well... if someone calls and i transfer to u, den the customer or whoever puts down b4 u ans the cal, do u blame me for letting u lose a customer or sumthing? dunno tt stupid idiotic auntie which is 26 yrs old onli, experience PMS or what!

Well... all i can say is tt, for the past 3 dayz, i'm fine wif the company... now, i'm facing hell and i'll explode 1 of these dayz... and i dun care cos i'm onli a temp staff!

Starting Work Tomolo!

Woke up early in the morning cos i caught a chill last nite and was sneezing away... So when mom came hme, i got out of the bed.

After brushing up and haf my breakfast, i watched TV wif mom... Taiwanese shows which r draggy... but i've finish watching oreadi. Cos its a repeat telecast and it was shown b4 @ ard 4pm last time. And i noe the whole story. Its actually nice show though its draggy tt 'aunties' watched.

In the afternoon, Joanna called me. She was wif Dianna and they were in sch. They beri sian... so jio me out. I bathe and met them @ Orchard ard 2.30pm ba... den went HMV cos Joanna wanna buy CD... after tt, i'm hungry cos morning ate damn little... so went to Pastamania for Spicy Chicken! I love spicy food!

After tt, Patricia and Fenella came and after i've eaten, we went to Takashimaya to find Amalia...

We left after tokin crap wif her. And i saw this girl named Christine! She can say to be my sista. We haf the same surname and dunno y we juz can clique together. Always tok nonsense wif her. Chat wif her for a while and knew tt her house was broken into! Poor gal... lost her LV wallet with her ID inside and of cos $$$.

Aniwayz, my agent called me today and there's job available. At 1st, she told me tt its Accounts Assistant @ Jurong East IBP. But got to send my resume to the client. I tink i didnt get the job, thus she offer me another job @ tuas. Its receptionist which i dun realli like. But i wanna get a job. and waitin for jobs to be offer is a damn long journey.

And i agreed to let her send my resume. And tata~ i got the job... I'm workin tomolo. Its 8am to 5.30pm... long workin hours sia... but nvm la... got $ to earn can liao. Or else i cant pay my sch fees!

Nid to catch some sleep today or else i'll ba late tomolo.

Mid-Autumn Festival

Today is Lunar 15th August.

The moon is round and bright. U'll be able to see Chang'Er flyin to the moon. And u might spot a shadow of the little cute rabbit by lookin at the moon. If u dun see it, u r not dreaming!

Haha... It's juz tales... I've never seen such things in my whole life! So is there realli a rabbit? Nah... i doubt so... cos i tink it juz cant survive without oxygen. Dun tell me it brought oxygen tank up to the moon...

Today mani families will gather together and maybe chit chat and eat moon cakes. I dunno if i have such gathering in the past when my grandparents were still around. All i noe is tt now, tis festival is nothing to me. Cos, i'm not like younger dayz whereby i look forward to buy new laterns and playin of candles.

Its not beri fun now... maybe there's no such mood for it animore. Or shall i say, i'm bored with playin all these.

Now, i onli look forward to Chinese New Year, Valentines' Day, Birthday.

Opps... If i ever get married, i'll not look forward to Chinese New Year animore. Wahaha...

Oh my! My mom juz asked me what time i'm studyin tomolo! Hello mom! I'm currently havin holiday! My exams juz over! Pls dun stress me animore!

Today went for facial in the morning... after that went to my students' house. After tuition, i took bus den MRT den bus home... On the way, i bought dinner.

So tired now... Goin slp soon... Loss of slp the past few dayz...

My Hair!

Yeah... i did my hair today! I'm supposed to wake up early and mit my mom @ 10am... but when she called me @ 8.45am... i'm still slpin... and of cos in the end i wake up la... Cos i wanna do my hair!

My hair had been a mess ever since i last cut my hair... it juz look like the lion king.

So i've decided to rebound my hair and also b'coz my dear cousin's weddin is approaching soon. Thus, i wan my hair to be a little easier to manage. Well, spent 100 over bucks on my hair cos also done the treatment and such. Cos the hairstylists said tt my hair is super duper damaged!
All thanks to the free dyed service tt bleached my hair and causing it to be 'dead'. So the ends are super dry.

Now, i've rebounded my hair, i'm super happi! Cos i can juz go out without havin to comb my hair... Haha... I love straight hair.

I got to do more treatments before my hair went crazy again. I must try to make it a point to do treatment once every 2 weeks. So i muz try to scrimp... nono expensive food for myself. Got to eat grass soon. So tt i no nid spend $$$.

These few dayz...

Its been 6 dayz ever since we last met...
Here's my calculation again!
6 dayz = 144 hrs = 8,640 mins = 518,400 secs !!!

See... it's tt long...

I'm kind of hungry now. Cos onli had salad for the whole day! Tink i'm gonna faint soon. Very long nv post ani new entries oreadi. Cos i'm having the deadly exams! It's killing me slowly with its poison... Oh my! What am i tokin abt? Rather crazy nowadayz...

On Monday, i took the CIP paper... On Tuesday, i took the MIEC paper... On Wednesday, i took the BSTATS paper...

I can onli pray hard that i can pass the papers!

After the paper on Wednesday, went for interview with Amalia, Joanna, Ming Sui & Fenella... It's Customer Service Officer @ Singtel loh... But onli Me, Amalia & Ming Sui kana chosen...

Supposedly got to go for training this morning @ 10am and start to work @ 3pm... but we chose not to go oreadi... though we were chosen.

Aniwayz, after the interview yesterday, all of us went to Orchard and had our dinner there... We went to Breeks! for our dinner... After tt i accompany Ming Sui home while the rest went their own ways... Cos me and Ming Sui goin clubbin and she didn't bring her i/c out!

After takin the i/c, we went down to ChinaBlack... we wanted to go clubbin cos Zouk will be closing for upgrading this Sunday and as usual, we goes to Chinablack for drinks and after tt we'll take a cab down to Zouk to dance... If thirsty, den will get a drink...

So after drinkin, we took a cab down to Zouk... Damn long queue sia... i tink mani ppl noes abt it's upgrading thingy... thus, they went down tt day... aniwayz its ladies nite...

We started queuing and after some time, Ming Sui felt unwell n she sat by the roadside. After tt she wanna vomit... but where to vomit? Roadside is the onli choice... Cos there's no toilet outside! So in the end, Ming Sui wanna go home... Well... she wanna go clubbin n she wanna go hme... but of cos i willingly go back wif her... aniwayz the queue is super duper long... so bo bian... i tink Fri and Sat will also haf a lot of peeps... so if u wanna go down, pls go down early!

And ya! I saw Xia Xue... her fren drives n there's 3 passengers in the car... In the end their car turns out... so i dunno did they go Zouk anot...

I dunno y ppl dun like XiaXue... Maybe its the way she writes her blog makes ppl with low EQ angry... But i dun understand y ppl say she ugly... I dun tink she's ugly wad... I dun tink tt she's fat loh... I tink ppl r jealous of her... tt's y they say tt ba...

Cuming back to today's update... we didnt go for the job training and of cos no job la... so we went down to Recruit Express @ Jurong East JTC Summit...

After tt, we went down to Orchard for some shopping and i'm hungry... so we went coffee bean cos we wanna chit chat... n i ate the Ceasar Salad with chicken... Well... i like coffee bean's ceasar salad a lot! whenever i wanted to eat food @ coffee bean, i'll order tt... nice... and i drank mocha ice-blended as well... n tt's my meal of the day.

After tt, we walked to HMV... i'm kind of pissed off today by tt stupid idiotic Kim! Idiot... Spoil my day lor... An advice to ppl out there... pls reply ur frenz with small letters... and not all BIG CAPS LETTER! and also try not to put '!' ... I simply hate it when ppl msg me like tis... i noe i might be askin stupid things. but also no nid to go such extend. Cos normally sms will be misinterprete. So if u put ani of the above, it will make the matter worse.

I'm oreadi in bad mood ever since i received Kim's msg... and on top of tt, when i reached hme n call tt guy and tell him abt collecting mooncake from my hse, it makes matter worse. Out of kindness, i've bought the mooncake for him n his family members. Its those tt ppl make frm home. Thus, there's no preservatives and can onli keep for 3 to 4 dayz.

That time oreadi wasted 1 box coz mani dayz nv collect n it turns bad. Now this box he also wan to dilly dally. So i msg him sayin next day and next day, later spoil.

Well, the reply was tt he say he nv ask me to buy wad. Oh my! Out of kindness and this is wad i got. Aniwayz, i've learnt sumthing out of this. NEVER be kind to anione. Cos no one will appreciate.

It's true tt i bought it without askin u... but i pay wif my own $ can? I simply hate this man! Thought tt man say after thinkin, he understand tt i'm kind enough to buy mooncake for his family, but there's still this buai song feelin in me. I juz dun like ppl to treat me like dirt can?

U never noe the feelin. cos u never buy things tt i nv request for me. Things i requested also not granted. Well... anione wanna sponsor me the things i wan? U got the things u wanted. Though still haben buy the golf spikes.

I've decided not to buy le... Will i get things i wan if i request? The ans is NO... ACtually the thing that is the most impt is $$$... i onli nid $1000++ for my next semester sch fees. The rest can wait. i tink those wanna sponsor me things one... Sponsor me with Vitamin M will do... den i'll have no worries abt my sch fees and i dun haf to work!

Dun wanna tok abt all these things le la... cos if i wanna grumble, i can grumble the whole of my life!

Kim! U idiot! I hate u... Dun ever let me c u again... Though we will still see each other... Pls try to hide ur face in future. Cos i'll slap u!

Hate!

Actually i dun intend to post another entry for today. But i juz cant help it.

Juz hang up the fone wif him. Rather annoyed. We chatted normally but he juz kept on wantin to hang up the fone. Well... I've been studyin n we hardly chat n of cos didnt mit up these 2 dayz.

2 days = 48 hrs = 2,880 mins = 172,800 secs

See! it's tt long ok... so dun say 2 dayz only! N he said tt u scared wont haf the chance to tok meh? YAH! indeed i'm worried. who knows what might happen? U or ME might juz be dead the next day. Who noes?

Somemore tomolo tt paper is rather not killer paper... the killer papers r on tuesday n wednesday. So let me haf a break la... Damn fed up + annoyed + restless + angry + ???

Juz hate it! Come my hse accompany aso dun haf... I nid a companion... not someone who leaves me aside!

A story abt a girl...

Long time ago, there's a girl called Piggyxin.

She loves to sing n of cos... She's called Piggyxin cos she's fat n lazy. On tis very saturday, she woke up early in the mornin when she slept at 3am the previous nite... which is Saturday mornin. Den she got to wake up at 8am. Hw tired it is.

She dragged her heavy body n brush up. After gettin changed, she waited for her family n they set off to their relative's hse.

Had buffet at her cousin's hse... cos there's an event goin on...

Went hme ard 3pm n she started to slack. Helped out in the preparation of dinner n went for a bath. After which, she went to slp...

On Sept 11, she woke up at 12pm! Such a pig! Went for lunch ard 1pm n here she is now typin tis entry. Time for revision for tomolo's exam. Bye everyone...

Infa Exam

Today's Infa paper is shit! A piece of idiotic exam paper tt i feel like usin it to wipe my ass!

I went to sch ard 11++am... den study at the library till 1.30pm lidat... cos my paper is at 2pm... so me n my gurliez walked to the convention centre... we reached there Ard 1.40pm... den cannot enter le! wow liao... sianz... got to wait till 2pm sharp den can enter... stupid examiners... somemore so mani ppl...

Cannot be we all late rite? Muz be ur timin fast la.. n indeed the clock at the examination hall is fast! By ard 5 mins... tt's y our time 1.40, theirs is 1.45... After we r bein allowed to enter, we juz threw our bags on the floor wif buai song face... den walked quickly to our seats.

Well... i sat down n started to do qns 1... it took me 1.15mins lidat to complete... n i'm left wif less than 45 mins to complete the other 2 qns. (when i enter the exam hall is 2pm... walk to my seat n settle down wasted abt 5 mins or more)

What's worse was Qns 3 got part a, b, c, d and e... d and e is at the beri last page n i miz out tt 2 parts which carries 16 marks! Oh well... i doubt i noe hw to do it aniwayz. I'm damn stress lor... I went in n start to scribble down P & L format... but 1/2 way thru'... i oreadi forgot... thus my P & L is nothing but again... SHIT! I didnt complete the paper... n some of my frenz didnt complete as well. I tink we nid to feedback on sumthing... y do we haf to draw our own table? cant they juz lay out like the papers which can be bought outside? GRH!

Enuf said... I can onli pray hard tt i can pass... it doesnt matter to me even if i get border line passin... i juz dun wanna repeat! I still got another 3 more papers... i shall not let my mood affect my studies...

After the exams, i'm actually supposedly to pick up my cousin at the CCK MRT... well... he's Primary 6 n is his 1st time ever takin the journey frm the MRT station at his hse to my hse... well.. Woodlands to CCK is not far aniwayz... haha...

But my mom not workin... so i ask her to pick him up instead... cos i wan go dating... i beri bad hor. But my mom agreed la. If she dun wan pick him up i aso LL... but i got nice mummy... haha...

So i ate in sch wif gurliez... n after tt i went to Dar's hse... n we went to Marina Square...
We went Coffee Club to eat... but i'm so full cos i ate in sch ard 4.30pm... Dar ate a bit at his hse... so we onli went for drinks n dessert... Dar ordered Iced Rambutan n i ordered Ice Passion Tea... N my favourite dessert : Muddy Mud Pie !!!

Actually got the urge to order the Garlic Prawn Pasta which i like also... but i doubt we can fnish n luckily Dar stop me from orderin...

After sittin down n tok cock, we walked to Suntec. Went to collect my mom's make over photos... Actually the shop is closed. But there's still ppl inside doin editin of photos. So luckily a kind lady saw me n open the shuttle to let me in. Good service... well... shall recommand to all of u... It's at Suntec City, near cinema there.

After collectin the photos, we went Carrefour. Bought the 1 BBQ Honey Chicken Leg(Boneless) n 1 Hawaiian Chicken Leg (Boneless)... its nice! Dar n i like tt! Haha... After tt went back hme... its like 11++pm le... i reached hme ard 11.40pm lidat...

My cousin stayin at my hse... so i got to slp at my eldest sis room tonite... cos she wont be hme n my cousin dun dare to slp alone! Pri 6 and a boy... still so timid... hw to go NS in future? he is always a baby boy to us... cos since he's a baby, he's under our care as my mom used to be baby-sitter... tt's y my tis cousin is close to us. n stays at my hse most of the times. Dunno issit a fortune or disaster to haf him close to us... haiz...

Got to go slp.. cos got to wake up early tomolo n got to study! Another 3 more papers to go...

S T R E S S

Do u noe hw to read these letter?

Stress! This is hw i'm feelin rite nw... at this very day...

Today will be my infa paper... i'm kind of forgot everything... i dunno y i suddenly feelin so damn idiotic nervous. I'm afraid of repeatin the module... i'm so so so scared...

Well... i've juz done 1/2 way thru the past yr paper... n i was like... biang eh... i dunno hw to do!

WTH! i dunno wad gone into me... i tot i noe everything. But nah... i dunno anithin actually... i've been readin shit all these while i tink... i juz cant concentrate... i nid some remedy. Maybe shall ask my mom to cook pig brain for me so tt i'll haf super gd memory. Pigs r not stupid. they r clever! so i nid their brain!!!

I nid to go slp n wake up at 7am later... den will go sch to study... i hope i can wake up.
Mom not workin... so i guess i haf a live alarm clock... i shall nw stop writin my bloggy... n will return after my infa paper...

Happi Birthday Dar!

Well... u might tink i'm mad...

Yes! i'm gettin rather crazy... i didnt die... cos i was too tired to commit suicide... n after slpin, i woke up to becum another me!

tt's such a ridiculous thingy... but its sooo much trueee... i dunno y... but when i woke up tis mornin, i feel so great! no thoughts of commitin suicide... actually last nite i tink i'm too stressed... tt's y the devil tot juz *blink* float in my mind...

Well... 1st of all to start my post, i would like to wish my Dar Dar a beri Happi Birthday! 26 yrs old le... old ah pek oreadi... and pls find a job... opps! i noe u r lookin for 1... but maybe expectation lower a bit? den it'll be much easier to find ba...

k.. enuf before i got scoldin again!

Tomolo will be a tough day for me... cos its Infa Exam! my 1st paper... i wonder if i can make it thru anot... today i studied... and suddenly i can absorb a lot of things sia... i dunno y everytime juz b4 my exam, i can study beri well... dunno issit b'cos i'm used to last min work... Haha...

My legs been achin since yesterday... due to excessive stretchin durin Yoga class on Tuesday nite... Yesterday mornin i can't get out of my little bed cos my thigh there beri painful... but i got to drag myself out to gif tuition.

Today, i got to get out of my bed cos sumone press the doorbell. I tot it was my mom cos before tt, she called some time ago askin me wad i wanna eat. So i tot she rch hme n maybe she bought mani things n couldn't open the door. So i got to the door n c thru the 'peepin hole'... tt's wad i cal it... i aso dunno wad it is called. well... aniwayz, i got there n i saw no one! made me run to the door with tears rollin down my cheeks cos damn painful...

The pain is frm my butt down to the knee.. its so painful tt when i stand up, its pain. When i sit down... u'll hear a loud *thud*... cos i can't sit down as usual... cos of the pain. i wonder if tomolo i'll be okay anot. can u imagine seein someone walkin like a duck, den when she sits down u hear her mournin away n sits down butt almost rchin the chair n *boom* she sits on the chair.

I sit down like auntie sia... so paisei... when i got down the bus, i aso get down like auntie... step by step. i tink i nid to cast my leg... so tt ppl will tink my leg is injured n it wont be so paisei.

Dar say he might be mitin me tomolo. I dunno will we mit anot. Shall c lor... Rather depressed again. dunno y... the devil is chasin after me again!

I nid some care n concern. I nid u to be beside me. I miz u sooooo much tt u dunno.

Nonsense me... Gettin crazy again... shall get back to my studies... my Bstats is still on the pending... haha... dun realli understand. n i guess i wont be understandin it at all.. i'm juz blindly memorizin everything. My infa is still 1/2 bucket of water...

Another 5 mins more!

Another 5 more mins will be Dar's b/d le... waitin for the time to cum so tt i can sms him... Oh my... miss him so much... he'll be ah pek after tis b/d... 26 yrs old oreadi... no kid animore ok... time for marriage... OPPS... did i juz say marriage? tink i've gone crazy...

Not the time for marriage rite now... we dun haf stable income! If we r damn filthy rich, den sure get married rite now... even though i haven complete my studies... but of cos we r not capable so we can onli strive hard now...

Juz sent the b/d msg over... haha...cos rite now is 12am le! Hope he will c the msg n maybe cal me? Tink i shall not imagine so wonderful things... or else i'll be in tears when i go to slp...

Was actually quite upset today... tomolo is Dar's b/d... i was tinkin of mitin him today... cos tomolo i'll be at hme studyin the whole day... so after givin tuition, i called him.

But he dint wanna mit. So fine, i wanted to get him the golf spikes... is kind of spikes which is fixed onto the bottom of the golf shoes... kind of grip thingy... but he say i dunno hw to get... oh ya... its true tt i dunno hw to buy... cos there r mani types. But u didnt wanna cum out...

So in the end i decided to go hme... n while waitin for train, he sms me... tellin me his shoe type n ask me to tell the person n ask if can exchange if not compatible...

Well... i'm oreadi damn pissed off... cos before tt he say after my exams den go out n buy... i was tinkin... 'U mean after my exams over than u will mit me issit?'

Stupid exams... i juz hate it to the core... its u tt made me sad n stress n quarrel wif him...

Till now i'm still tearin... cos its been mani dayz since i last saw him... like tis hw to study? u tell me? i was stonin while sitted at my study table... nothing gets into my head now... therefore i decided to blog... to vent all my anger...

I remember quarrelin wif him tis evening over the fone... he 9++pm say he tired... ok lo... fine... i onli noe i'm upset over 1 thingy... he is mitin his secondary sch frenz tomolo for lunch at Suntec... Since i will be hme studyin for the whole tomolo... y cant u mit me for today? I feel like killin myself... feel like jumpin down the blk... feel like endin everything... even my dreams r all abt exams... and here u r tellin me to study n study again? its not as if i nv study... y cant u juz gif me a day break?

If u nv c me bloggin in future, it means i might be dead...

I've not been eatin beri well nowadays... losin appetite... but when i feel like it, i'll start gorging myself wif food again... what on earth is happenin to me? no one cares... NO ONE! i hope he can at least cum n accompany me... to c hw i'm doin... i feel so unloved... i'm juz a nobody... i nid to calm down for mani dayz...

I dunno if i still nid to pass him the birthday card anot... or shall i juz tear it n throw it into the rubbish bin... it doesn't matter animore since he wont be mitin me tis few dayz... next week den mit me... his b/d over le... it wont be the same animore...

If tomolo i realli nv c him, i might consider tearin it away... m i being impulsive or issit b'coz the lack of love tt made me like tis? Y m i like a tap? tearin n tearin away... i'm relyin on him too much... i juz cant live without him... is tis 2-sided love or issit a 1-sided love? i realli dunno...

Buzi Day...

Sometimes i wonder issit worth workin so hard anot... We live for once... n i tot we shld live life to the fullest? Y muz we haf exams? Y??? i love studyin cos is much more fun than workin... workin life juz sucks... u'll noe it once u go out to the society... whereby ppl onli care abt themselves... Even if they r free, they'll bully u by askin u to do tis n tt if u tell them u got the time to spare... so here's a trick for u readers out there...

Even if hw free u r during work, aso tell them u r damn fuckin idiotic buzi... n find sumthin to do... even if reviewin things u've oreadi done... is aso sumthin to do... this is personally my own experience... especially if u've colleagues aged abt 40 yrs old or older... cos they r damn freakin waitin for retirement...

I suddenly remember all these bad memories cos i went to Recruit Express today... n its the same agency i went to... at Jurong East JTC Summit there... previously my job is recommanded thru there...

Y i went there... of cos go look for a job la... cos 14 Sept is my last paper... den i'll haf abt 1 1/2mths for me to work... well... i got to pay for own sch fees... tt's y i got to work... or else i might nid to stop studyin... n tt wont get me aniwhere wif onli a o level cert...

Tokin abt exams... i dunno y muz we haf exams... someone wif higher qualification doesn't mean he can work... i noe of ppl who r like pumpkins... study damn hard... but like 'shu dai zi'... tis is bad... cos if they were to go out to the society... i'm sure they cannot survive sia... cos they blur blur one... onli noe hw to study... which some things cannot be learnt thru studyin...

Y cant we juz study... n forgone the exams...? well... this is kind of stress... we wan a stress-free country...but i doubt we can ever achieve tt... Even workin life is stress... but is diff kind of stress.

I dunno y i hate exams so much... maybe i tend to stone durin the exams... n everything is kind of *snap* gone when i'm in the exam hall. & mani times, i nid to *snap* to wake up... n when i finally woke up, the time had past 30 mins to 1 hr... terrible rite...

Aniwayz... back to my usual again... i woke up in the mornin... leave hme ard 9.15am... cos i mit my agent @ 10am... so i reached dere ard 9.45am lidat... but sumthing on my way to Jurong East... i suddenly remembered tt i forgot to bring out my uniform which i wore when i used to work at Cheveron... cos i nid to return... so i called my dearest mom...

After mitin up wif my agent, i called mom again... cos i'll be on my way to Cheveron... so in the end i reached Cheveron at ard 10.30am... den waited for my mom... but she reached at 11.15am lidat...

Something happened before she reached... i was waitin at the bus stop juz outside Cheveron... den there was tis car... but i dint c the car plate no... tis guy... ard aged 35 yrs old... drive along the roadside and ask if i nid a lift... wth... he is someone so old n fat... maybe he is out of some kindness... but pls... for goodness sake... i dunno u n here u r so fugly ugly fatty... wanna gif me a lift? even if u r yandao i aso wont hopped in... u tink u can cheat me? nahz... not so easy...

I told my mom abt it... n she was like... haha... u aso got ppl wan meh... (well... i was quite upset over it...)... but after tt she ask me wad is his car plate no.... n i was like tinkin ' i dunno leh '... n she den relate tt maybe those missing kids or wad is board tis kind of ppl's car... den the person make her drowsy or wad... den dunno do wad... oh my... my mom is so creative tt she can actually be a write or sumthing... but we cannot mark out tis possibility aso la... but too bad, i juz dint notice the car plate number...

Well, after returning the uniform, we took 188 to CCK... den went to buy mooncake... yummy... i love snow skin mooncakes... anione wanna get me some snow skin mooncakes which is durian flavour? cos we didnt managed to get durian flavour today... cos dun haf... i'm so sad... i wanna eat Shangri-La mooncake... i heard its nice... but to me all r nice... provided no yolk inside... yucks... yolk is salty... doesn't match wif the sweetness... tis is wad i feel la... dun tell me yolk is nice... cos i repeat... tis is my opinion... i hate it when i say my opinion den ppl 'shoot' me back... if u dun like reading my blog, den dun read... dun ever try to 'shoot' me back... cos i REPEAT 'i hate it'...

Well... after buyin the mooncake which is custard flavour, green tea n the other 1 i dunno wad flavour... mom wanted to go Fond Hugs to c the clothings... n she got 1 for herself n bought 1 for me... the clothes r nice... well... i've a few pieces of their clothings... tt's y i say i love the clothes... after my sis bought 10 pieces of tops frm dere... she is a shoppin queen...

Its 1.30am nw... which is 7th Sept nw... tomolo is Dar's b/d... i hope i can mit him tonite... to countdown wif him... but i guess he wont wan cos he will ask me to study... i kind of miss him... Sunday was the last time i saw him... we seldom tok on fone oreadi... den no c each other summore... haiz... got bf like no bf lidat...

20 dayz more...

Unhappiness....

I've been slpin the whole day! i've wasted my time... Last nite actually goin clubbin wif Dar and Thai fren... but in the end the ting is being cancelled off... cos the Thai fren's bf not socialable... so we didnt go at all... but i'm oreadi dressed up loh... so in the end Dar n me went to watch movie... One More Chance... Nice show... kind of funny... there's a storyline behind it...

Wad the hell is happenin to the blog? i juz cant upload photos again... sumthing is definitely wrong wif it...

i tink somewhat my previous post abt the superstar thingy did offend sum ppl... well, i'm not critising or look down cos he's diabled... in fact, i admire him... but well well... haiz... dun wanna defend animore in case there's more dispute over it...

Well... rather buzi nowadayz... cos Exams is juz round the corner... my 1st paper on this cumin fri... 9th Sept... Cant celebrate Dar's b/d on 8th Sept le...so sad rite... but got to study damn hard.. cos another 3 papers is on consecutive dayz... Monday...Tuesday and Wednesday sia... last paper on 14th Sept... i'll go clubbin after tt... haha...

So tired... wanna slp le... tomolo got to wake up early to study... den afternoon got to go give tuition cos tis saturday not goin to tuition le... den evenin got to take care of Dar's nephew... buzi day...

Gd morning...

Oh...Good Morning... its my 2nd post of the day... I woke up early? Nahz... pls read my previous post b4 reading tis la...

Okiez... i didnt slp at all... miracle... though i'm damn tired, but i juz cant slp... was tinkin a lot... till i cant slp... and my mr cough is back again... coughin the whole nite... guess got to take my medicine again... if tonite still coughin den cant go c baby le... or else spread disease...

Wad was i tinkin abt leh? Well... tink its kind of 'usual stuff' for sumone... he will again say i everytime nothing betta to do... tink of all these... i guess i'm sufferin frm some kind of depression... i juz had this stupid idiotic tot... or i shall say mani tots...

I feel so tired in this relationship... i'm still hangin on... cos i dun wanna let go... n i dun wish to let go... i juz dun bear to let go... cos i believe 1 day... he'll love me heartedly... am i stupid to tink in such way? i dunno if he oreadi love me with all his heart or he still cant make himself to love me whole heartedly...

It seems to me tt i'm rather stupid... whenever i got problems... i talked, but he will say tis n tat... for example 'things haben happen n u tink so much'... well, u dun tink beforehand den when things realli happen den u crack brain meh... hello... u got to tink of solutions cos when the real thing strikes, u wont tink so much n normally the decision u make is wrong...

So u ask me plan n tink for future... den shall i reply u...'when future cums den decide la...now haben happen...tink so much for wad...' lidat u song anot?

oh well... he reads my postings... i noe he sure will get angry over tis post... but i dun care... i wann raise my opinion... correct me if i'm wrong... pls dun gif me black face after u c tis post... n i feel damn hungry nw sia... nv eat anithing though i feel hungry since the previous post... guess my gastric will act up again later...

this posting is quite fast...cos now 8am... i onli used ard 20 mins to type the post...

Boredom

Oh well... blogging during such an early morning...3.30am sia...abt tt time la... well well... simply b'cos of the followings tt made me blog now...

1) Cant get to slp...
2) Sista complain tt i nv update my blog
3) Nothing betta to do (which dun realli seems to be the case)
4) I wan to tell my dear diary things i cant keep inside me...
5) i'm feelin terrible

guess the above reasons is enuf oreadi... cos i still got a few but... haiz... dunno y i nw wantin to blog oreadi den i feel damn sleepy... aniwayz... while bloggin nw, i'm enjoyin the Oishi Green tea with lemon... which was brought back by myself during my recent trip to Bangkok which is quite long ago in May this yr... there's also another flavour to this green tea... which is green tea with genmai...

Dunno wad is goin on sia... wanna show u all the pics of my nice drink... but i cant upload the photos... argh! i've tried a few times... so i'm not goin to try oreadi... onli 140KB aso cant load meh?

aniwayz...its juz a nice drink... if anione wanna go Thailand... pls help me buy... haha... but of cos get the photos of the drink frm me... or u wan me to keep the bottle? haha... aniwayz... i've juz finished my drink cos cant load pics... den fed up

and aso i juz read xiaxue's bloggy... her post on s'pore idols and the recent superstar thingy...

I tink they oreadi plan to let whoever win... tt's my personal point of view... those who dun agree or is Weilian's fans... pls bear wif me cos i'm statin my point of view.

Well u see, now both got contract... juz different company... Weilian got contract from Play Music i think... which is not tt 'gd'... ermz... kind of not as good as universal music which Kelly got the contract from. and i tink sooner or later... Jun Yang and Xin Hui will aso haf their own albums... i tink tt's for sure cos Maia (i tink i spelled her name correctly) which participated in S'pore Idol... haf her own album too... though i nv realli go to CDs store to see...but sumone told me abt it and i was like...'huh? she got her own album?'

So tt's goes to show... if the 'idol' is tt gd, those music company will let them make their own album... so we shall save $ to vote the 'idols'...

I tink i'm damn bo liao cos i'm actually tokin so much abt idol thingy... which i normally dun tok in blogs...

Back to my usual self... tok abt my life... Ermz.. today... i shall say yesterday, Fri, 2 Sept...
I slept till ard 2pm...when Christine called me... after tt den realised tt 11++am, Joyce called me... so i returned her call... and she told me tt she, Amalia and Joanna... were at Ang Mo Kio Breeks!... Ask me wanna go anot... and i was still quite blur cos haben brush up...

But in the end i didnt go la... cos i dun haf $$ to afford... damn broke now... cos mani ppl's birthday... summore this month i wanna celebrate my Dar's b/d and our 2nd anniversary...

By right, i should go return uniform today...but slept till so late... so i gave up the thought...

After i woke up, i brush up... and Mummy came hme from work... she holds 2 jobs... so she went to work at nite... and returns the next day...

And yea...i got my breakfast plus lunch which is called brunch... am i rite? my 'brunch' is century egg wif pork ball porridge... i love porridge... though i hate it when i was little...

After tt, i went to slp again! i felt like pig sia... eat pork still act like pig...

7pm lidat, i received a call... the 3 girlz ask me go KAP (King's Albert's Park) mit them... of cos i was reluctant... cos i got to travel so far sia... if i were to be at Dar's place, i'll sure go... cos near ma... is of walkin distance... but frm my hse go there i wan faint... so i ask them y not cum to CCK MacDonald... they dun wan... in the end they cum my hse...

Hey girls... dedicated to u all... y so strange huh...my hse is near to Lot 1 leh... den if go Lot 1, they still wan cum my hse... dunno y they suddenly so strange... but of cos i let them cum... cos i alwayz welcum ppl cum... provided they dun say my hse messy... but indeed its damn messy...

But onli Amalia and Joanna came... Joyce went back hme... they slack at my hse till 9.30pm... and i forgot another thing... Joanna a little crazy today... she drank some alcohol at my hse... onli 1 cup for her... i think she feelin stress sia... aniwayz... i made a glass of Jim Beam wif Honey! i tink its nice... cos i tasted it b4 givin it to her... haha... cos my hse no coke...so i tot of using honey instead of gassy drink... clever me... but hope she dun go back diarrhoa...

Wow... i blog till here and its 4.15am le... me b'cum panda le...haha

Suddenly felt crazy... i miz him so much...

A Thai fren came to s'proe wif her bf... Dar and his frenz will be mitin them for dinner... i nid to go my cousin hse cos her baby 1 mth old... hope Dar they all haf activities after their dinner... den i can join...

I hate my hair sia... everyday bad hair day... see my hair i sian mani mani mani... y cant i haf nice hair... i hope tt i can do curl... but my hair dun allow such event... cos i seriously nid reboundin instead of curls... my grown out hair is not flat... its kind of a lot and summore machiam kana bomb... tt's y i cant cut short hair...

Everyone haf different kind of hair... y cant i be the luckier ones... which dun nid to spend time on the hair... i dun haf enuf $ to eat... still gif me hair problems...wad is this? y so unfair sia...

I wan to color my hair too... cos too black... i'm afraid of dolls... so if my hair is plainly black, i'll be so scared... imagine myself havin black hair and lookin into mirror... argh! summore long hair... wow liao... scary... if short, black...den ok... but long and black...

i've booked the Advanced Theory test... it'll be on 11 October... damn long... dunno wait till tt day i can still remember i got the test anot... and after i take the test, i nid to renew my PDL oreadi... cos expire in Oct... and i onli went for less than 10 lessons.. and now i forgot hw to drive le... i dunno wan to change to auto anot... driving manual is drivin me mad... clutch... sianz...

Hw i wish u r wif me everyday... i tink i'm goin crazy aso... his image kept poppin up in my mind... and i realli miz him a lot... the last time i saw him was on Sunday... if Saturday still nv c him... den Sunday aso nv c him... argh...

And ya.. i dreamt of him yesterday... i tink it was in the morning... cos i remember wakin up once... and i tink the dream came after i slept again...

It's so damn true lidat... i shall not blog here wad i dreamt of...

I'm starting to be crazy... i tink i've mentioned b4... but i dunno y... issit a lack of slp... or issit sumthing bad is goin to happen?

We've been quarreling alot... actually Monday wanted to go his hse... but den... waited and waited... no car... as his father uses the car and was not hme... so in the end, he declared tt he not pickin me up... and of cos, i'm angry... but i didnt say anithing...

Tuesday leh, same thing happened again... i came back frm my yoga class... and after tt i waited n waited... also same thing happen.. this time round, i'm angry... real angry n start to throw temper... he say not his fault... cos his Dad uses the car... well... i was tinkin... y muz he share car? get his own car la... den no more such problems... but i dun wanna say... cos i tink he will say... no $$ etc... n i shall not say animore too... cos he realli damn broke...

If i can afford, i'll get him a car... den i wont be so sad too... no car= no goin out...

He dun like crowd... if wanna go town area... he will say crowded or sumthing like... later the bus crowded... if got car to drive, he aso complain abt jam n stuffs lidat...

Fine... since lidat... den we shall be frog in the well...

I hate myself! i juz hate it... my life... stuffs lidat... i feel damn miserable... crying... yes... i'm cryin right now... i feel so weak... i cant tolerate my life... working...studyin... payin my own things... i'm workin for tt little $$ and i got to pay for expenses myself... sch fees, daily expenses, clothings, make-ups, facial... even shampoo, conditioner n shower foam... though i might noe hw to earn $... but i do wish to be like some ppl who dun nid to work... or work for extra $... tink they realli haf gd life... i envy them... i wanna earn much more $ den juz givin tuition...

Had enuf of myself... i hate my nonsense... y i kept complainin? argh! its 5am... tis timing... alwayz reminds me of Daddy... when i got woken up at such time cos Daddy leavin us... n we rushed down to SGH... but well.. tt's oreadi in the past... i can onli let him be part of my memory... though the memories of him r fadin...