Stress Devils are coming after me!

My common test dates are drawing near. 2 papers are being brought forward before the term break. You see, we usually have our papers after our break which is called study week.

Now, 2 papers are being brought forward which means, i'm left with 1 more week to study 2 papers! Stress again. But on a lighter note, i don't have to study too much during my break. Cos i'll be left with another 2 more papers nia and 1 of which is after the common test week but that will be the semester paper i guessed. Pardon me as i'm quite blur.

So, which means, i'm quite free during my break! And here i am, ready to go Bintan with my sisters! My eldest sis claimed that she will sponsor everything except food. So, i guessed that i will just starve myself. Haahaa... Opps, i haven't tell Dar about my trip yet... I'll be setting off on 31st Dec and comes back on the 2nd Jan... 3 dayz 2 nights... I simply love overseas trip. It will be a relaxing time for me. I hope it won't rain for a day so that i can go sun-tanning.

I want to be a different me when I'm back to school in January after the term break.

I'm seriously trying to shed kilos from my body now. I want to get 45kg! I want back my old weight! I miss my little 45kg so much so that i can dream of it every night. OMG!

I wants to fit myself back to the old pants i got in my wardrobe which my mom urged me to throw it away when i pack my wardrobe recently. But i don't bear to cos, if i were to throw it away, i'll have no motivation. I know i'm short. I know i'm fat. I KNOW!

Before Chinese New Year, I want to slim down and let my relatives see that I'm back to my past and please if i slim down, don't say i too skinny le. Which my auntie from my mom side said that in the past and that's why i started to eat to gain weight and i regretted now. No more supper for me. No more late dinner for me. If i'm hungry, don't tempt me. I eat fruits, i drink water but not sinful food.

I want to show Dar that i have discipline too! He can easily slim down his tummy, i can too! Please show me support instead of demoralising me. I will faint 1 day if i continue to skip my meals... Please send me to the hospital asap if that ever happens.

I hate most food. They are gross... They are like shit. You eat it, they process and turns to shit. So why must we eat them? I'm starting to become looney... Please don't bother too much about me as i don't even know what i'm doing right now.

I hate BCA lecture today. The lecturer don't even know well of the program she's teaching. I wonder how can she teach when she still can ask us 'how huh'? 'y lidat'... Wow biang, please go knock your head against the wall...

Well, i really got to stop as i'm going to do my BCA assignment Units F & G... got to hand in thru the internet by Sunday... And i need to do my tutorials and start my revision for my common test.